July 25th, 2006
Dysphoric
I’m currently have a bit of financial trouble, I think that it’ll be over soon. It’s just very stressful and it also reminds of the other things that are bothering me. Lack of career path and good income, dislike of the myself physically, the lonely state of living by myself, and my ridiculous fear of death. The thoughts just seem to all come down at once. If I’m thinking about one, I seem to think of the others shortly after. I know it’s silly. I also know that it’ll be alright. Not everything can exactly as I want it, it takes time. Not everyone wants the same things I do. And in some of the cases I need to make a move or decision to change to what I don’t like. And I already have a plan for the financial dilemma. It’s all good. I’ll survive once again 
Oh oh! I have a new loveseat for my livingroom, and a cozy reading chair for the bedroom…yay! So I need to move some more stuff around and clean up a bit. It’ll be nice. I’m not really sure where Steve’e ‘puter will go yet, but I’m sure we’ll figure it out…I need a computer room… and a washer and dryer… but that’s wishful thinking.
Mousey Update: Newlove sealed up the hole, and there has been no sign of the enemy. Traps are on standby though…
On the Work Front: Tonight a fellow around my age (23) or younger came into the diningroom bleeding. Miranda and lil’ Emily (the front gal) asked him if he was alright and he asked for an ambulance. Emily got him some paper towels to clean up some of the blood and he stood there and waited for an ambulance while I offered him more paper towels so he wouldn’t bleed all over the floor or counter. He had two cuts on his right cheek. They were both extremely clean cuts, which struck me as strange, but I didn’t say anything. He has blood dripping down his neck onto his shirt.
Emily had a hard time dialing the number, probably because she was flustered, so Miranda called and told them he was there and asked them to come to the back. Bleeding Guy then asked for the bathroom, and I pointed the way, and Emily told him to follow. Once in the bathroom, Miranda and Emily made sure he was not completely dying and then escorted him to the back to sit at the patio table and wait for the ambulance.
While waiting for the ambulance, Miranda drilled him with important questions. Like “What happened?”, which he answered with “He wasn’t sure” and changed his answer a bunch of times. I think he said once that “It just happened behind BW3’s” and same thing only behind Brewster’s. “It just happened” is not the write answer if you have been cut and are bleeding. She then asked him if he was on drugs or drunk and told him cops would be coming along with the ambulance. He said that he doesn’t do any of that.
A cop showed up first, and asked some questions (I was actually watching this part from the store in the security camera because I don’t think it helps to have a million people standing around the problem in the way) and shined a flashlight onto his face and mention the perfect looking cuts. I don’t remember well, but I think the girls came back in at this time. I believe the cop ushered to the ambulance that had arrived by that time. The cop then came inside and talked to Miranda and told her that the guy is crazy and is a cutter. Just that morning he had been in the emergency room (the EMT recognized him) with a huge cut on the inside of his arm going from is upper arm to his forearm. He lied and told them it was a construction accident. He ended up getting stitches. He had most definetly done it to himself, just like the newer cuts on his face. The cop then went on to tell us that the whole time we had been trying to help him and get him outside, he had been holding a razor. So he told us to be more careful.
I think that Emily was a bit bothered and confused because she said that she recognized him (He looked familar to me too, but I couldn’t figure out why) from when she worked at Meijer. She didn’t know him well, just recognized him and knew his name. She said she had been cleaning a table and she saw him walk by, 3 minutes before he came in bleeding, looking perfectly fine. Doug also said he saw him just a but earlier back behind the library with a bike. The whole thing was strange and sad…
In the Late Late Night News: Steve was dropping me off at my house with my laundry tonight around 4:30a, and I was saying goodbye, when a drunk mexican fellow starts approaching the car. He then continues to ask for a ride home, because he is drunk and cops suck (usually a true story there). He even offered gas money. I tried to find a good lie that wasn’t too rude, but it was a bit too hard when he wasn’t really listening, and when I told him to ask Steve, Steve had the same problem I think. So the drunk fellow got a ride home. He rode in the front seat, where he wasn’t behind the driver and where I could see him and everything he was doing real well. I also took Steve’s cell phone, just in case he turned out to be a crazy serial killer. Steve also slipped me a small screwdriver in case I needed to stab someone, so I kept both items in the hands, screwdriver hidden though. He asked to stop at a gas station first, and so Steve asked if the Circle K was alright, and Drunk Guy approved. So Drunk guy got his coffee or smokes or whatever and we left to take him to Williams St. Here’s a tip: Drunk people don’t really give good directions. Hell, this barely even gave directions. And the ones he did gice consisted of saying Wooster St over and over. So Steve drove slow and watched for street signs and I asked him if it was before or after Quarters Carryout. Which it was. So the crazy mexican accented drunk fellow got home. And I didn’t have to stab anyone. Did I mention he said he works at El Zarape? It’d be kinda funny if he recognized us next time we go in there…
So there’s a strange day, and the sad part is that wasn’t even all the weird stuff that happened, just the weirdest, and most interesting…